Food for thoughts

Duh! I don't need to be an expert to know that
No wonder they told me not to drink before the trip
How much for the other half?

Hmmm, looks familiar.

Maybe they sell bibles

Stop Working! Save Yourselves!'

Please save all of yourselves. Stop working. It may just kill you. Seems that the major cause of heart attack are your colleagues. Don't believe me? Read the article.

Words Women USe

I managed to extract more words from the Dictionary of Women's English.

Fine ..This is the word women use to end an argument when they are right and you need to shut up.

Five minutes .. If she is getting dressed, this is half an hour. Five minutes is only five minutes if you have just been given 5 more minutes to watch the game before helping around the house.

Nothing .. This is the calm before the storm. This means "something", and you should be on your toes. Arguments that begin with 'Nothing' usually end in "Fine".

Go ahead .. This is a dare, not permission. Don't do it.

Loud sigh .. This is actually a word, but is a non-verbal statement often misunderstood by men. A "loud sigh" means she thinks you are an idiot and wonders why she is wasting her time standing here and arguing with you over "Nothing".

That's okay .. This is one of the most dangerous statements that a woman can make to a man. "Th at's okay" means that she wants to think long and hard before deciding how and when you will pay for your mistake.

Thanks .. A woman is thanking you. Do not question it or faint, Just say "you're welcome".

Dictionary for Men & Women

You know, I always thought that there was only one type of Dictionary for English. I knew some words have more than one meaning, but recently I received an email that clearly proves that there is a need for 2 dictionaries. One for men and one for women. Here are some extracts from the 2 dictionaries.


WOMEN'S ENGLISH:

1. Yes = No
2. No = Yes
3. Maybe = No
4. We need = I want
5. I am sorry = You'll be sorry
6. We need to talk = You're in trouble
7. Sure, go ahead = You better not
8. Do what you want = You will pay for this later
9. I am not upset = Of course I am upset, you moron!
10. You're very attentive tonight = Is sex all you ever think about?

MEN'S ENGLISH
1. I am hungry = I am hungry
2. I am sleepy = I am sleepy
3. I am tired = I am tired
4. Nice dress = Nice cleavage!
5. I love you = Let's have sex now
6. I am bored = Do you want to have sex?
7. May I have this dance? = I'd like to have sex with you
8. Can I call you sometime? = I'd like to have sex with you
9. Do you want to go to a movie? = I'd like to have sex with you
10. Can I take you out to dinner? = I'd like to have sex with you
11. Those shoes don't go with that outfit = I'm gay

Now, how true is that...

Michelin Man's & His Kid

Lately I came upon a story of the Michelin Man. For all of you who did not know, the Michelin Man is the mascot in the picture above. It seems that he came to Malaysia a few years ago to settle down.


He married a Malaysian girl and soon had a kid. I managed to meet the couple and have a picture of their kid.
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